Lonely or Just Alone?
The words “lonely” and “alone” have seemingly grown to mean the same thing. Yes,
loneliness means a sad feeling you get when you are alone, but do not assume that
Because you are alone, you must feel lonely.
Many of the words we use to describe our emotional state combine a situation and a
feeling. When we are busy and happy, we are thriving. On the other hand, when we are
busy and sad, we are worn out. The same principle applies to being alone. When we are
alone and sad, we call that loneliness. However, being alone and happy – which can be
called serenity, solitude, or contentment – is often looked over.
Just because we are accustomed to associating being alone with being lonely does not
mean that it’s always true. Being in college, moving to another town, and leaving loved
ones naturally come with lots of time alone, but it doesn’t have to be a dreadful thing.
There is immense value in the time you spend alone, and it can be utilized for lots of
personal growth.
Benefits of Being Alone
Learning to do things on our own
More specifically, living on your own can help you learn so much about practical life skills and how to solve problems more effectively. When nobody is there to help you quickly fix your drain or unclog the vacuum, you eventually start to take matters into your own hands and learn as you go. You might also eventually start to learn more about cooking and cleaning if you were used to someone else doing those things for you in the past.
Emotional reset & mindfulness
Being alone is very helpful for mindfulness, training thinking patterns, mental clarity, and
reflection. When you have enough quiet time for yourself, you begin to reflect, wonder what
you could have done better, and eventually grow from your mistakes. A quiet place to think
can also help you sort through a rough day and regulate your emotions before your next
social interaction, helping you build better relationships with those around you. Having
these spaces can act like a recharge and reset that you might not get if you were sharing
your time with others. Mindfulness overall can change your life in wonderful ways, and
being alone makes it so much easier.
More room for creativity and personal growth
Whether you’re writing, studying, making art, or pursuing any other hobby you may have,
time alone is the best way to really lock in on those solo activities. Taking a break from social activities to focus on something you are passionate about can really help you build deeper self-awareness and grow as a person. When your mind has space to wander freely, it provides space for creative thinking, which can help spark creativity and fresh ideas.
Conquering going out on your own
One of the most intimidating things about spending time alone is being in public by
yourself; however, there are many benefits. The more you go out by yourself, the easier it
gets each time. After you’re used to going out by yourself, it’s no longer scary to get your
mail or wait in line for food alone. While it is scary at first, the confidence needed to do
things on your own is a life skill you will always need, and it’s better to start sooner rather
than later.
Eating alone
Eating alone can also feel upsetting, because food is often shared with family and friends
and seen as something that brings people together. But there are still many ways to enjoy a
meal without sharing it with someone. You can treat a meal like a date with yourself, order
something you enjoy, pay attention to what you’re eating, and take your time while eating it.
You could also do things to keep your mind busy while you eat if that’s what it takes to keep
you fed. You could call a loved one, sit in a crowded area and watch your surroundings,
listen to music, or even watch your favorite show.
Exercising/going to the gym alone
This is another tough one because many people have anxiety about going to the gym, regardless of whether they’re alone or not. However, everything is much easier if you focus
inwardly. Getting exercise should be about you and for you, so focusing on what the people
around you might think takes away from the time you could be spending taking care of
yourself. Some things that can help you focus more inward or feel less anxious are having a
plan, listening to music, going during low occupancy hours, and starting small. You could
also start with something small, like a walk outdoors or an at-home workout. At the end of the day, everybody has the right to take care of themselves, and remembering that can help
the gym be far less intimidating.
Overall, changing the way you look at your time alone can be revolutionary to your self-growth. Being alone does not mean you’re lonely. Being alone is an amazing opportunity to recharge your social battery, think creatively, work hard, and practice mindfulness. Yes, it
can come with anxiety and moments when you feel sad. However, overcoming those challenges is so worthwhile. That being said, continue to reach out to your loved ones, continue to make friends, and meet new people, because relationships with others are just as important as your time alone.